My stepfather turned 89 last week and my mother will reach that same milestone in November. To me, people living that long is truly amazing.
When I was a ten year old boy, I thought 89 was friggin’ ancient. For Pete’s sake, that was people who were born in the 1880’s and said “for Pete’s sake” a lot.
These days, I cannot fathom what it will be like (if I’m lucky) to be walking around in this same body for another 25 years. At 64, I already feel like the downhill slope has begun and I’m only being a little bit dramatic.
Sure, I can still move couches or unload a truck, but not without feeling damn sore for a week or two afterwards. Yes, despite practicing yoga, eating responsibly and going to bed by 10:30, I feel like I am the one who should be turning 89!
And I’m still what some folks call, “baby old.”
If you are 40 and you are reading this, you are probably thinking, “if I take care of myself I will grow old gracefully. All I’ve gotta do is exercise three times per week, eat less red meat and meditate. Scott is surely exaggerating.”
Nope.
You might be 54 or you might be 74, but you are going to wake up one day and say, “What the fuck? This stinks!” And then you will be a passenger on either the express train or the local one – but you are headed downtown.
For over six decades, I have been a relatively healthy guy. I am disease-free and I check “no” on every intake form I’ve ever filled out. This year, however, I have sat on a lot of exam tables, given lots of blood and urine samples, had two MRIs, an ultrasound and a really crazy test called an EMG. I have four new doctors on my team and a physical therapist, too. And this is for two common issues – a frozen shoulder and sciatica.
I also wake up at 3:00 am to pee every night and often read for an hour before I slide back into a light sleep. And if I can’t fall asleep, I lie awake and try to stay calm. It’s getting harder, though, when the doctors and therapists I’m seeing aren’t making the pain disappear.
Forty five years ago, I remember my grandmother freaking out while I was driving her to LaGuardia airport. We were running a bit late due to congestion and she was getting more worried every minute that we sat in traffic. She started crying. This was a woman who had traveled all over the world. Why was she so anxious?
The answer is that while we older humans may have finally developed the wisdom to be peaceful and logical most of the time, our minds are slowly turning into Cream of Wheat and our once- proud bodies are refusing to follow simple orders. And it’s not going to improve…unless the fountain of youth is discovered.
My stepdad and my mom are older now than any of my grandparents lasted. They have adapted to their changing bodies and they both still want to keep on living. They have come to accept that having moderate or even some serious aches and pains are better than the alternative.
Yes. I am baby old. I still am crying out and wanting it to stop. Let’s hope I live long enough to move into my golden years with an awareness that being alive is something to be thankful for every day. May it be true for you, too.