Moving On

For those who are coming to this space for the first time, welcome! We are Beth & Scott Bierko, once homeowners in Yorktown Heights, NY and currently living the life of full-time RVers. After a one-month trial trip in August of 2021, we decided that it was time to sell our home while the market was high. We purchased a truck and off we went in February 2022. Our Adventure has many goals: to see the country and meet her people, to determine if there’s another place we want to plant some roots and to try out a mobile work/life balance. Along the way, we decided to keep a journal in the form of this blog. It’s a place where we tell the tales of the things we do, but as importantly, where we can share the thoughts and feelings that come up during constant change. Thank you for being here, and for choosing to be a traveling buddy!

This morning, I want to give a shout-out to my life coach, Greg Kilpatrick. I met Greg while we were in Weaverville, NC at a men’s group meeting. For the last month, Greg and I have been working together and his mentorship has proved invaluable in helping me work through some of the blocks that get in the way of my journey. If you need a great coach, contact Greg at gregokilpatrick@gmail.com. If you’ve been noticing that I’m posting some songs, lately, send a prayer of thanks to him!

It wouldn’t be an adventure without the drama, the sturm and drang that life throws at us to see if we’re serious about whatever goals we’re trying to reach. Looking back on these last six months, every obstacle has fulfilled its purpose of either bringing me into the present moment (love) or causing me to run screaming in the other direction (fear). In the end, it’s all love or the absence of it.

Today, we move from Lenoir City, TN to Hartford, TN. The moving day always brings a bit of anxiety, excitement and grief. We say “goodbye” to one place, the paths we’ve trod with our dog, Bradley, and the vistas and people we’ve met. We need to pack our camper for travel so that everything inside doesn’t end up on the floor and secure it to the truck. If we’re lucky to be in a “full hook-up” site, we disengage from the electric system, remove the hose that brings city water into the camper and lastly, clear out the grey and black water via a hose that connects to the town septic system. Sometimes, individual sites don’t have a septic system, but there’s always one on-site near the exit. For those worried about this stuff, I can report that it’s quite easy and clean.

Scarier than septic for some is the idea of being with your spouse 24/7. Our trailer is about as big as a mini-Snickers bar, so there’s the proximity issue as well to deal with. Beth and I literally have to turn sideways to pass one another in the camper. Some of our fellow campers have RVs that are twice as big, but my guess is that having more cabinets for your stuff doesn’t allow you to escape the “stuff” you have in your relationship.

Our secret weapon is communication. We have been traveling and working together for nearly 30 years and during that time we have found that what works for us is talking about EVERYTHING. I call our marriage “our greatest creation,” something we’ve worked on harder than having children or running our businesses. For us, being close together does increase the intensity of our differences, but it also increases our ability to work through them.

Everything in life brings us to the same crossroads: fear or love. We either run away or we move through it. In my life, running away has meant isolating, turning to shopping or booze and food. For some, this may work just fine and it kind’ve worked for me for more than fifty years. But something was always off. I knew that I was caught at a level in the game that wasn’t fulfilling my potential, just like many of the men in my family tree. I was stuck in fear and I needed out!

Beth & Scott’s Adventure is us taking our marriage on the road. We didn’t bring our couch and all my guitars, but we brought every thought and feeling we could fit. We brought our fear and our love and we’re experiencing each one every day. Sometimes, like yesterday, I collapse and close my eyes for two hours. I get overwhelmed by the journey and I feel lost, scared and sad. I’ve come to see this for what it is – the leading edge of new growth. It brings me to my knees and that’s great because that’s the place where fear can be expressed, released and replaced with true love. Aaaah.

I appreciate you reading this. I really do. I have heard from enough of you to know that I’m not alone, that these feelings aren’t just personal – they’re in all of us. If my journey helps to clarify anything for you, I’m happy. We are all traveling on this tiny planet around the sun. We are all on the Adventure of our lifetimes. I’m glad to be with you. Keep coming back. It works if you work it and you’re worth it.