It’s time to start meditating, again. The Adventure is generally enjoyable, but it’s feeling a bit bumpy this morning. I’m surprised. Yesterday was really nice – a good sleep, some kayaking on the lake, a sweet conversation with our friends, and a new song written during Beth’s yoga session (“Just for Today”). What’s with the grey mood?
The weather, again, matches my emotions. It’s a little cool and cloudy, though warm enough to be outdoors typing at the picnic table next to our camper. The birds are improvising their daily symphony and Bradley’s in his happy place – the back of the pickup truck. So why am I feeling so….blah?
I became interested in mediation when I was ten years old. While visiting some family friends, their oldest boy taught me about Zen meditation and I remember staring at a candle. I found it fascinating and the idea of quieting the mind (though I wouldn’t have called it that at 10) really interested me. My parents remember me as “moody” from a young age, so it might be that mediation, even then, felt like a way onto another plane.
At fifteen years old, I learned how to meditate by attending a course in Transcendental Meditation (TM). In my forties, I spent some time at the Kripalu Center and later with a local yoga teacher and later a Shaman to learn some new techniques. In my fifties, Beth and I completed a course with Mindful Schools so that we could teach mindfulness to students and teachers. In my fifties, I returned to the cushion (though it was often an overstuffed chair) with some zest.
Yesterday, Beth was listening to NPR and I overheard the conversation while moving around the camper. The host and her guest were discussing cannabis and the way it was going to be rolled out in New York and New Jersey via dispensaries and, eventually, through “longtime members of the industry” with an accent on those who have been incarcerated for drug use/selling and their family members.
I’m a big fan of decriminalization, but I’m worried that a lot of people are going to start making pot the way that they manage stress. What’s the matter with meditation? Ach. I’m judging others.
Just for today, though, I’m going to turn my focus inward. I need to let go of the worry and anger and focus instead on compassion for myself and others. That’s what the song says, so that’s what I’m gonna do!